


Taking It One Crash At A Time

by a2h1ey



Series: Tony Fics Based On Tumblr [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attempt at Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, James "Rhodey" Rhodes is a Good Bro, M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Outsider, Pining Idiots Learn To Use Actual Words, Rhodey is also Done with Everyone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:08:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22287640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a2h1ey/pseuds/a2h1ey
Summary: Based on this Incorrect Quote on Tumblr:Rhodey: Just go up to Barnes and ask him out. What’s the worst that could happen?Tony: I could die.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark
Series: Tony Fics Based On Tumblr [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1603999
Comments: 1
Kudos: 229





	Taking It One Crash At A Time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [itsagentromanoff](https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsagentromanoff/gifts).



> Original Quote from itsagentromanoff on Tumblr.
> 
> So, this is new for me, tried writing from an outside PoV for once, and first time writing Crack, so... let's see how this goes, shall we?
> 
> (I love Rhodey; he's Best Bro. <3 Oh, and marked T for Language, because Rhodey is /that/ done.)
> 
> Originally posted on my tumblr (@saraceaser) so it's there, but it's the (horribly) unedited version... Like, I'm talking I rewrote entire parts of this, it was awful, ugh.

Honestly Rhodey was, as just about all of the others in the Tower, done with them. _Done._

He silently watched as Tony, yet again, let out another long, maudlin sigh. Rhodey could all but see the hearts and flowers radiating from him.

He knew without looking that the idiot genius was, _again_ , staring into the living room. After all, these days it’s rare when the two idiots were in the same room and _weren't_ so obviously pining after each other.

Rhodey sighed. If only his idiot brother wasn’t so _blind_ to what literally everyone else could see... But of course, he was absolutely oblivious, as Tony naturally was.

Then again, Barnes was just as blind. 

Case in point: the moment Tony looked away - and ugh, his face was just the picture of ‘love-sick pining’ - Barnes, from the other side of the goddamn _room_ , immediately started staring at Tony.

And like two lovers in a trashy romance dime novel, he had the same exact look Tony had.

Rhodey sighed, rubbing his forehead as he got up to grab some more coffee; it was too early to deal with this.

But, being the gracious friend and brother that he was, grabbed Tony’s coffee to refill it for him, since he was staring into space, daydreaming like the maudlin maiden he claimed he wasn't. Because he was just _that_ generous.

Setting it on the table, he leveled Tony with a stare, waiting for the idiot genius to pick up the cup and finally notice him. 

Of course, from the confused arching brow, he didn’t understand. Because Rhodey was best friends with an oblivious dumbass.

If Rhodey didn’t love him so much he would have just locked him and Barnes in a closet together and be done with it.

“Tony. Just go up to Barnes and ask him out. What’s the worst that could happen?”

It wasn't the first time he asked the same exact question, but he was surprised by the answer this time around.

“I could die.”

“You could die,” he repeated in the driest tone he could make. Because, really? The likelihood of Barnes hurting Tony were about as likely for the moon to be made of cheese, if he was talking literally.

“Yes, because he’s _going_ to say no, and then I’m going to _break_ , Rhodey, I’m going to break into a thousand pieces, and my heart can’t take that! My heart’s going to _break_ , I’m going to _break_ , and then I’m going to die, because there’s _no way_ that Bucky Barnes lo-likes me the way I do,” he all but yelled at this point, having gotten increasingly louder with obvious nerves and anxiety.

Rhodey, seeing movement behind Tony, flicked his eyes up to, lo’ and behold, the other pining dumbass himself.

Who, by from the very complicated expression he sported - he hopes JARVIS saved a picture of that because it was _priceless_ \- heard everything Tony said.

Speaking of which, the idiot genius was _still_ going; clearly he forgot that A) Barnes had super hearing and B) he had been in the very next room.

“-and he’s just _so_ amazing, Rhodey! He deserves so, _so_ much better than what I could ever give, and he’s my friend, and I lo-like him so much and I’ll just _break_ when he hates me, so I just _can't_ -”

Seemed like he finally dove right into self-loathing and panic, as he wont to do, but Rhodey stopped from saying anything when he remembered who was standing exactly behind his best friend.

A glance back up revealed that Barnes' face had settled on ‘determination’, with a good bit of ‘protectiveness’ and 'hopeful awe'.

Rhodey snorted; at least he didn't have to have ‘ _the talk_ ’ as harshly as he was planning. Honestly, he wouldn't do it at all except for the principle of it.

“And-what, why are you laughing? Rhodey, this is _serious_! Is there something-”

And Rhodey had the pleasure of watching Tony turn, only to realize that yes, his crush was standing right behind him and, also yes, he had heard everything.

He was so totally going to get JARVIS to send him a copy of all of this later.

With a sigh, he stood up with a crack in his back - he really needed to stop spending so many hours hunched over a desk - grabbed his coffee, gave Tony a pat on the shoulder - not that he seemed to notice, judging from his tomato red face and deer-in-headlights eyes - before walking out of the kitchen.

Mornings sucked, but he might as well get a head start on all that paperwork that awaited him.

(Later, Rhodey would laugh with the others over the video JARVIS was more than happy to provide, teasing a dark red Tony who sat cuddled up in a pretty content looking Barnes’ lap, arms wrapped firmly around him.

He also did have that ‘ _talk_ ’ with Barnes, but he had to admit, they were sickeningly cute together, so he went easy on him.

...He really needed more coffee.)

**Author's Note:**

> Fun Fact: I had no idea what to put for a title, and ended up using the Doc title I used for a place holder. And yes, it's a play on the words of 'Taking it one step at a time', because the Avengers (read: Tony) doesn't do one step, of course.
> 
> Another Fun Fact: Originally was supposed to feature Captain America!Bucky because there's definitely not enough of that for WinterIron, but... I'm okay with how it turned out, anyways, so. *shrugs* A different time and Fic, I guess.
> 
> Um, let me know if you have questions or something? Hope you have a lovely day, and thank you for reading!


End file.
